Thursday, December 3, 2009

{recuperating after the food coma}

Honestly, maybe it is just me but I still feel like I am recuperating from what I call the once a year "food coma", that is, when Thanksgiving rolls around and introduces us to all these fine and delicious foods then sets us up for a complete and utter diet distaster by ruin the rest of our palettes for the rest of the holiday season. Do you ever feel like all you were born to do was just eat? Now I don't mean this literally but honestly, you cook and bake all day and then lo and behold you sit down for like half an hour at tops and eat until you are soooo sick you can't sit down without feeling like your stomach is going to blow a fuse. How upsetting and delightful all at the same time. The one day a year where you are encouraged to eat as much as you can and no one will make you feel bad because after all its Thanksgiving. Be thankful for the food, be thankful for the company and above all be thankful for the idea that next year you can go and do it all over again! Hahahaa! I don't think our stomachs ever walk away (oh... I guess they don't walk away but I guess they kind of just sit there while we walk away with them....oh ....ewwwww....ahhhhh) any way you know what I mean, I am sure they don't walk away feeling so happy for us OR so thankful. We have stretched the living daylights out of them. Put some very nasty combinations of things inside them (cranberries and mashed potatos? Come on people!) and then suggest that yes, in about twenty minutes you are going to ingest as much pie as you possibly can too. Pumpkin, apple, pecan. Oh and don't forget the nut tray. Who could right. It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without giving the Nutcracker a good work for his money now would it? Crack that baby open and make all the nummy noises you can because by jov its Thanksgiving and remember, you can eat anything and everything you want. Just don't and I mean don't even consider following that meal with anything sparkling to drink. Want to know why? First off, air bubbles are a torcherous rider for all that turkey dumpling you just enjoyed. Second off, I am sure you are just going to send all that stuffing or heck dressing (do other people really know the difference, come on don't LIE!) thru the roof of your epoglotus because guess why, all that stuffing is going to expand with all those bubbles. No wonder we are so absolutely and horridly bloated and irritable the next day. Whoever thought that ingesting that much salt, sugar and bubbly could actually be good for you. Sorry to be the party pooper here but really, you know that what I am saying is perfectly correct.

Okay so right now you should all be laughing. I want you to laugh. You know why? Because I know you are all stressing out about your Christmas shopping right now. Am I going to make you all mad by telling you that I am all done with my shopping? Yep... done, finished, wrapped, tucked away and there! Done!!!!! Hahahah! ;-)


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